Am I An Addict?

“My wife says I’m an addict. She is super over-reactive and judgmental.”

“I’m concerned about how I depend on having that glass or two of wine each night.”

“My husband says I’m an alcoholic. He gets upset when I have even one drink.”

“I’m worried I may be an alcoholic but I think I’m just a social drinker who sometimes overdoes it.”

“I definitely find myself going shopping when I’m feeling down and I’ve done some things that have gotten me into some serious trouble financially, so I’ve wondered if I have an addiction problem.”

“Just because I use pornography now and then, she says I’m a sex addict.”

“I’ve done a number of different drugs, but I don’t think I have any problem stopping or saying no.”

“I think I use food when I am feeling depressed and I use marijuana when I’ve said I’m not going to anymore, but I don’t know if I have addiction or not.”

“My spouse gets furious about my spending sprees and says I have a shopping addiction, but s/he is just angry anytime I spend money on myself.”

“I drink to the point of blacking out about once a month but I’m not sure if I have a drinking problem.”

“I have a stressful job and things with my family are really rough and going to the casino just feels like the only down time I have. I am concerned, though, about how much I depend on it for coping with life.”

Phrases just like these have been shared in my office. People wonder, “Am I an addict?” Others wonder if they have an addictive personality. Others are frustrated that their partner or their family member is sure they are an addict, but they don’t see it that way. Are they just in denial?

And what is an addict? The root of the word addict in the English language originally meant to be legally or formally bound to someone or something; or to have something in your life to which you had a strong inclination or which had become a habit. In the early 1900s it began to be used in association with certain drugs. The word addict has been used casually for centuries (“he’s just addicted to his job”), but it is commonly used now to mean someone who is dependent on a substance or a behavior to the point that stopping becomes incredibly difficult. Webster’s dictionary defines addicted as “physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects.” With this definition you see two characteristics of what is commonly associated with addiction: dependence and withdrawal.

For many, the word addiction or addict has deeply negative connotations. Someone who is an addict is an addict for life; they are weak and flawed in character; they have no will power and are just lazy and selfish. There are negative stereotypes of the addict as someone who lives on the street, can’t keep a job, steals from their family, is intoxicated continually, and has ruined and destroyed their lives and the lives of those around them. The reality is that many who fall under what we might define as an addict have full time jobs, are diligent in providing for their family, go on vacations, and own homes. They might be parents, workmates, brothers or sisters, and friends.

Today, the recovery community is torn over the words addict and addiction. If you are an alcoholic, are you an alcoholic for life? Do you recover or is recovery a lifetime process? Are you powerless? Some have very strong reactions to these questions. However, whether or not a person believes in the idea of powerless in connection to addiction, there is no question that the unending draw of a substance or behavior, a draw they have tried and failed to quit time and again, leaves people feeling powerless and hopeless.

To answer the question "Am I an addict?", it might help to look at a standard assessment of addiction to see if it applies. It can help to do an impersonal questionnaire and let it give a score. That may then help you determine how bad is my problem?

Some of the measurements I often use to help clients figure out the answer are the MAST (Michigan Alcohol Screening Test), the DAST (Drug Abuse Screening Test), and the SAST (Sexual Addiction Screening Test). There are other assessments that apply to various specific addictions, however you can also adjust these to apply to most substances or behaviors. These assessments reflect the criteria found in the diagnostic manual for mental health (DSM5). To get a reliable score, it is vital to answer honestly. The primary areas these measures cover include:

1) The amount of use - as in if someone uses (drinks, gambles, does pornography) more than most people, if they continually use more to get the effect, if it’s been used to the point of passing out, or if they have put a limit on it and don’t hold to it;

2) When or how they use or the purpose of using - as in using in the morning, spending a significant amount of time using or preparing to use, using other drugs to counteract a substance, preoccupation or obsession with or feeling controlled by using (including craving), or using to cope with or escape emotion (anxiety, depression, sadness, anger);

3) Using regardless of the impact on self or others - as in despite the consequences to self (guilt, feeling degraded, danger to self), consequences to others (neglect, endangerment), when significant others have a concern, or hiding/lying to others;

4) If it has caused problems such as fights, a loss of a job, legal issues (DUIs, arrests, sex with minors), work problems, debt, or the loss of friendships (or avoiding social activities);

5) Physical manifestations of dependence (shaking, withdrawal, fatty liver/cirrhosis) or continuing to use to the point of physical consequences (bleeding, torn tissues);

6) If help has been sought - such as by a hospital, minister, therapist, or support group;

7) If someone has tried to stop but kept going back to using.

So, whether you believe in the word addict and regardless of whatever recovery model you embrace, examining these areas can help you determine just how significant of a problem you are having or just how serious you need to go about pursing the process of recovery. To be on the road of the ransomed journey, it can be vital to figure out what roads you’ve already been on and where they have taken you and others you love.